It is not normal to be happy all the time. If you are a happy all the time then you should be worried about your mental wellbeing. The fact is, we all experience highs and lows in our lives.
3 things about happiness to ponder are
1. I need to find my ‘purpose’ to be happy
Some people do manage to find their ‘purpose’ in life very quickly. Whether they want to help heal animals, to farm, to nurse, to teach or start a business; they know very quickly. And then go ahead with the business of fulfilling that purpose. Then wake one day and find they are not happy.
Other people are not sure what their purpose is but are continuously living moment by moment, day by day, week by week and month by month. And each day, each week, each month, and each year they work in different areas. On the way, they accumulate skills and experiences and this makes them happy.
Not having an identifiable purpose right away does not mean that you will be happy. As it is not simply a matter of choosing the right thing, but also a matter of choosing what is right for you.
2. Reaching my goals will make me happy
It is good to reach for and succeed in your life goals. Being a graduate, getting a job, getting a promotion, earning more money, owning your own house, owning your own business, getting married or travelling are typical goals. But, let’s say you graduate, start a business, get a job, get a promotion, begin to earn more money have met the person you want to marry and are travelling now and then. Are you always happy?
The answer is no because a promotion, the house, the money and the “soul mate” etc. will have ticked some boxes. Boxes to things that you consider a source of happiness but they are really just happy moments. Usually because other goals will come along.
When other goals come along, the process starts again. And eventually delay the happiness you are seeking as you keep getting more things done; to be happy.
3. Avoiding people will make me happy
Unfortunately, we are not immune to what other people do to us because our brains are not built that way but fortunately, what other people do is up to other people and has nothing to do with us. So if your mantra is
“I will keep to myself to avoid making myself unhappy” You are doing yourself a disservice.
Sometimes, things happen around you that have nothing to do with you. And you cannot control what other people do to you all the time. And even though things happen around you that have nothing to do with you (and are a drain on energy and resources) being connected to others socially is crucial to both your well-being and your survival. As humans, we’re simply happier when we pursue happiness with others.